


ASMR

by hirusen



Category: Sanders Sides, Thomas Sanders
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Basically The Others Has Issues And Logan Helps Them, Can't Relax, Emotionally Overwhelmed, Gen, High School/Collage Teacher!Logan, Human AU(?), Mild Language, Not Really Sure If That Counts, Platonic Relationships, Teacher-Student Relationship, The Mindscape, The Sides Can Separate From Thomas, Trouble Sleeping, creative block, tagging it anyway
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-11
Updated: 2018-03-12
Packaged: 2019-03-29 10:47:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,090
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13925544
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hirusen/pseuds/hirusen
Summary: He didn't think that taking his students papers and projects home to grade would help the others, but it did.





	1. Virgil

**Author's Note:**

> I was in the middle of writing a very...intense...story with Patton and Thomas and I needed to take a break from writing it because...well, hot and steamy porn is hot and steamy.
> 
> In short, I ended up listening to some ambient ASMR videos, since I usually listen to music when I write and needed to mix things up, and ended up listening to a few that were like office/classroom sounds and this idea came to mind (when I wrote this, I had, like, three other drafts I was working on which included the one with Patton and Thomas, so...yeah, MY creativity went a little wild).

Logan sighed deeply as he entered Thomas's home, toeing off his shoes as he closed the front door, his house keys being thrown onto the table near the door. His bag was heavy with his students papers and tests, mid-terms now over, but the grading still needed to be done.  _It just never ends._ It didn't help that Logan worked two jobs, having to grade papers for both the local high school and collage he taught at; he had only taught at those schools as a substitute in the beginning, upgrading to full time teacher when their students expressed that they enjoyed learning more from him rather than their original educator. Logan still smiles a little each time he thinks about it.

Now if only the others would listen to him like his students.

He stepped into the kitchen to grab himself a cup of coffee, since most of the household was coffee drinkers so there was almost always a fresh pot, when he noticed that Virgil was on the couch. He was curled up into a ball, knees pressed against his chest, his hands messing around with a fidget cube Roman had bought him to replace the spinner he lost. Judging by his shaking, Virgil still hadn't calmed down. Logan took a short breath before he walked into the commons, placing his cup down onto the coffee table as he took up the space next to the rocking ball of anxious nerves. "Virgil? Are you doing okay?"

He shot him a glare that very clearly said 'what the fuck do you think?' before he shook his head. "Would you like to come to my room, or are you more comfortable here?" It wasn't uncommon for Logan to invite Virgil into his room when he has anxiety attacks; his room is organized, quiet, and a place where one can easily focus on the task at hand--in short, it was an calm, efficient environment. Virgil nodded his head, reaching his hand out to take Logan's, who quickly accepted his touch, grabbing his coffee with his other hand as they stood and Thomas's mind lead them to his room.

Once they reached his room, Logan released his hold on Virgil's hand to open the door and let Anxiety go in first. It was obvious that he felt more relaxed as soon as he was inside. "Make yourself comfortable and remember to breathe, Virgil. I need to grade some papers, so I'll be at my desk should you need me." He faintly heard Virgil hum, taking note that he went over to his little reading corner by the window, scrunching up in the window sill. There as a light rain dripping down outside, so it made sense to Logan that Virgil would be drawn to a calming and relaxing sound.

Going to his desk, Logan sat down in his chair and hefted his bag onto the wooden desk. He placed his cup onto the coaster, pulled out the large stack of papers and set them onto the wood, gently placing his bag onto the floor after he retrieved his laptop that had been buried in said papers only moments ago. He opened it up, unlocking it so he could access his home screen, and quickly opened up the document that had all of his students and which class, grade, and school they belonged to. Did Logan mention that he teaches a class at all levels of high school and collage learning? Because he does. Which means a lot of freaking papers and tests he needed to grade.

Normally, what he's doing doesn't happen often; he's efficient enough to quickly grade each and every test and paper that's handed into him so that they're all graded by the end of the class (something his students are eternally grateful for), but mid-terms and term finals were a different story. He has to wait until the end of the class before he can begin grading them, since each class is a different level of learning--on top of a entirely different subject in most cases--so he doesn't have to worry about his students cheating on their tests. That being said, the last two or three classes he teaches for both the high school and collage don't have their tests and papers graded until he gets home since he will  _never_ grade his students work for another school if he's not teaching at that school at the time. Call him stubborn, but that's how he is.

He pulled a pen out of his desk and uncapped it, quickly flipping through the huge pile of papers and pulling out the ones for his high school students, moving the ones for his collage students to the corner of his desk. He clicked open a few more documents, having let another teacher borrow his answer keys for mid-terms, and started to grade each test. The room was silent, filled only with the gentle sounds of the rain pittering against the window, of pen scratching against paper, keys on Logan's laptop clicking as he entered in scores, and the occasional little  _thump_ of Logan's cup coming to rest against the coaster again after he's taken a sip. The teacher was halfway finished with the high school mid-terms when he noticed that the soft little clicking of Virgil's fidget cube had stopped.

Glancing up, he saw for a split second that Virgil was staring at him, expression showing his full engrossed focus on him before he jumped and looked away. "...Is there something you wanted to talk about, Virgil?" "N-No...I...I was just, lost in thought." Oh. So he was just 'spacing out' as Thomas would say. Well, as long as he hadn't been trying to get Logan's attention by staring at him, he didn't mind. He went back to his huge stack of papers.  _Maybe I should stay in my office for a little longer during mid-terms._ He's had set hours for students to come and talk to him in his office or classroom for so long that no one needed to ask what they were anymore; just find one of his students, current or past, and they'll tell you when he's available and how to get in touch with him when he's not. But lately, he's been considering extending that time so he could--hopefully--lessen the amount of paperwork he brought home with him every night.

It was another twenty minutes before he was finished with the papers for his high school students. "Let's see...Abby...Cody...Jack and Jacob...Peter..." He muttered to himself the names of the students he needed to pull aside; their scores were terrible, which was odd because they had the highest grades in his class, so he wanted to make sure that they were doing okay in their home life or see if they needed more help to understand the material. If he's learned anything from his years of teaching, it's that students can tell him that they need help with more than just their words; if a student that was doing well suddenly starts to perform poorly, or begins to come to class late or absent, it's a sign that there is something wrong and they need to talk to either him, another one of their teachers, or a faculty member.

Logan softly groaned as he glanced over to the pile of papers belonging to his collage students; he loved how they thought, how they came to their ideas and conclusions, but it was also thanks to their detailed explanations that he had to be stricter with their grades. Since they can easily provide him with detailed answers, he couldn't be as free with their grades, and thus had to give their papers a more critical eye. He was reaching for his coffee when he caught the glimpse of a body to his right, jumping in surprise when he found Virgil standing next to him. When the hell did this boy move? "Yes, Virgil?" "I, um...C-Could I...watch you work?" "...You can, but may I ask your reason?"

It's not that he minds when someone watches him work, but he's always interested in their reason behind it. Virgil cleared his throat, twisting his fingers around for a moment before he took a small breath. "I um...I like the sounds." "The sounds?" "Of you typing or...or marking the papers. It's...calming to me." Ah. "Virgil, have you considered listening to ASMR videos to help you relax when you have anxiety attacks?" He nodded head. "But the ones I end up finding don't really help me; Rainy Mood--the website that's just looping sounds of rain and distant storms?--that sorta helps, but not by much. I was...actually listening to an ASMR video before you came home, though it wasn't working at all." Hm. "And, listening to me work has helped you relax?" Virgil nodded. "I...I think the sounds of you typing and marking papers triggers a response for me; I can focus on it, use it as a means to center my mind and let my body relax naturally." Logan's eyebrows shot for his hairline.

"Really? You don't need to do your breathing exercise along with listening to me work?" "No. It's really weird; I've always done them when I have attacks, but I just listen to you grading papers and...they just...go away." Now that is interesting. "Well, if it's helping you then I don't mind." Anxiety smiled warmly to Logic, grabbing one of the extra chairs in the room and pulling it over to Logan's desk, sitting on the far right of his desk. Virgil crossed his arms and placed them on the wooden desk, his head resting against them as he watched Logan work, glancing over the answer key for a moment before double checking the paper to see if his students wrote the correct answers. After he had graded four papers, Virgil closed his eyes and just listened to Logan work. Logan paused to take a drink of his now warm coffee, glancing over to Virgil and saw that his eyes had closed, though he wasn't breathing deeply so he knew Thomas's anxiety hadn't fallen asleep. He placed his cup back down, threaded his hand through Virgil's hair soothingly, then went back to work; he didn't miss that little grin on Virgil's lips when he stroked his hair.

An hour later he was finished, writing down more names for students he needed to talk to privately. "Still with me, Virgil?" His long, slow inhale and exhale told him no. Logan chuckled warmly, standing up and carefully scooping Virgil into his arms, striding over to his bed and laying him down, making sure to cover him with one of the spare blankets he had at the foot of his bed (he was third on the totem-pole of people Virgil or Thomas came to if they were having nightmares or just trouble sleeping in general; second for Roman, and first for Patton if they were having issues with sleep). He went back to his desk, slipped the papers back into his bag before sitting in his chair again.

He took a shallow breath, leaning back in his seat until his back was firmly pressed against the chair.  _...I should start working on the next lesson plan._ He did like to get those made up before the current one was finished, and plus if he got them done now, he had a little more time to spend with Thomas and the rest of the family during the holidays. So he saved the grades for his students, closed all of the opened documents, and started a new one, double checking what he had already covered for each of his classes and what they needed to learn next. The sounds that filled the room now was Logan's typing, the gentle rain against the window, and Virgil's slow, deep, even breathing as he slept.


	2. Eli

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eli is one of the few reoccurring original characters that will be popping up now and then. Not 100 percent sure how many chapters I'll be doing (guessing at doing about 10 for now), but my original characters will only be showing up when Logan is either at the high school or collage.

A soft groan left him as he slowly swiveled his head, the tight kink in his neck finally popping loose after being stuck in his spine for the last three days. He really needed to let Roman have his way one of these nights and get pampered. He was going through the emails he had recieved during the school day, usually waiting until his students were doing classwork or the end of the day before he replied. Distantly, he could make out the sounds of the teenagers laughing and running up and down the halls from behind his closed door; it broke school rules for them to be doing that, but he and the other teachers usually let it slide since they did slow down or get out of someone's way so they didn't hurt anybody by accident.

He's grown so used to the sound that it's basically just background noise for him most days, tuning it out so his mind can focus on what he was doing. Of course, that ended when a solid  _thump_ landed against his door, followed by the sound of what seemed like paper or clothing sliding against the wood. Logan's eyes had snapped to the door at the abrupt noise, pausing in his typing and getting out of his chair. He walked closer to the door and he faintly heard what seemed like a child whimpering and sobbing on the other side of the wood. He slowly opened the door, alerting whoever was against it that it was moving, and was greeted to the sight of a youth in dark clothing and a tear soaked face.

"Eli? What's the matter?" Eli said nothing, casting their eyes to the ground and didn't make an attempt to speak or move. That's when Logan noticed the heavy, rapid breathing and the trembling. "Come inside, please." Logan softly ushered and Eli nodded, standing back up on unsteady legs, stumbling over their feet as they walked further into the classroom. Logan softly shut the door, turning to face his student. Eli had been transferred over from another high school when their family had to move into the area; they had only been going to the other school for two months, having just started high school as a freshmen. Logic has noticed that Eli tends to sit in the back of class, not talking to their peers unless given a group task to complete.

"Please sit down, Eli." Eli nodded, walking further away from the door and took a chair in one of the desks in the second row. Logan followed and knelt down in front of Eli, doing what he could to hold their eyes. "...Can you talk to me please? I want to help you, but I don't know how if you don't let me know what's going on." "I-I...I..!" The soft, girly voice reached Logan's ears, seeing the fear in Eli's eyes now. "Eli, it's alright. You're going to be okay. Just try to take slow breaths." "W-What's h-h-happening, Mr. Sanders?" "I believe you may be experiencing an anxiety attack. This is not a bad thing. It is a normal thing that people go through. All I want you to do, for right now, is to try to take slow, deep breaths." Eli tried, but they were struggling hard. Logan, knowing that Eli would begin to get lightheaded if he couldn't help calm them, glanced around the room for some of the items his students with mental or social issues borrowed while they're in class, straightening up and quickly going to the bookcase.

Eli gave him a puzzled look when he held out a plush rabbit toy. "You can hold her. Her name is Rose." He told Eli, a little grin on his lips when they took the stuffed animal and instantly cradled it to their chest. "Now while you're holding Rose, I'd like for you to keep your eyes on the clock." He waited until he saw Eli's eyes flicker up to it. "I want you to inhale through your nose for four seconds." He counted it out in his head as well, taking in Eli's shaking form to make sure they were going to be able to follow his instructions. "Hold it for 7 seconds." Keeping count in his head, the teacher picked up that Eli showed signs that the breathing exercise was working, if only a tiny bit. "Now exhale through your mouth for 8 seconds." Eli's hand shot out as they did so, latching onto Logan's shirt; the other just gave them a soft grin. "That's good, keep it up. Just focus on your breathing, Eli, you're doing good."

Eli nodded, loosening their hold on his shirt just a little. Logan felt so bad for his student; it was so clear that they were lost and afraid because of the anxiety attack, most likely never having one before now. When Eli's hand slipped off his shirt, Logan stood and strode over to his desk, grabbing the granola bar from the lunch Patton made him along with a fresh bottle of water from his mini-fridge (he normally kept water in it for his student to drink when they had tests or if it was just ridiculously hot and the school's AC just was  **not** cutting it); he came back into Eli's view, now calmer, and placed the food and drink on the desk next to them. "I've got some work I need to finish up, Eli, but I will still be here if you need to talk. In the meantime, keep up the breathing and feel free to have these if you're hungry or thirsty, okay?"

Again, Eli nodded, a look of gratitude in their eyes. Logic went back to his desk and paused only for a moment to take a drink from his thermos--which was filled with coffee--and to double check that Eli was, indeed, calming. Once he was sure they were, Logan began typing the rest of his reply to the email, proofreading it before sending it off. He opened up a document and started to write in the questions his students will be answering after they watch the rest of the video they started today (it wasn't too long but it covered the subject fairly well), sparing a glance in Eli's direction to make sure they hadn't relapsed into their anxiety attack.

It was another 15 minutes before, "Mr. Sanders?" He glanced up, a gentle smile on his lips as he met Eli's eyes. "Feeling better?" "Y-Yes. Thank you." It seems that they hadn't touched the granola bar, but had opened up the water and polished off half of it. Logan rose from his seat and walked back to Eli, kneeling down before them again. "Have you ever gone through an anxiety or panic attack before?" Logan questioned, Eli shaking their head. "In the last month, have you had trouble sleeping or felt like you couldn't breath? Perhaps a slight loss in appetite?" Eli nodded their head. "Is...Is that normal?" "Well, it can be. It seems to me that you've been very stressed ever since you've come to this area; isolating yourself in class, heading straight home once school is out, doing okay on your homework even though I know you understand the material very well." Eli raised a brow at his soft words.

"On your tests and in your papers, you excel at demonstrating your knowledge about the subject, yet in your daily homework you don't put in any effort, barely making the grade." Eli's eyes darted away. "...Do you find it hard to reach out to your classmates?" Eli silently agreed. "Are you being bullied?" "...Yes." "May I ask you whom that is?" The fear was back in Eli's eyes. "It's okay. If you don't want to tell me that information, you don't have to." "B-But...don't you have to know?" Logan sighed deeply. "Yes. I do. However, it's clear to me that whomever is bullying you has made you believe that things will get worse if you tell on them. Am I wrong?" "N-No, Mr. Sanders." "...Can you at least tell me what they're doing to bully you?"

"...'He'..." Logan raised a brow, confused. "I don't quite understand, Eli." "...Th-They...They keep calling me 'he' or 'him', but..." Logan hummed, a tender look in his eyes when he saw that Eli was now stroking Rose's soft fabric. He's really gonna have to thank Roman and Patton one of these days. "You don't like being called by those pronouns, do you?" "No." "May I ask what pronouns you'd like to be called by?" "Um...S-She/her..." "I don't want to presume, but do your pronouns match your gender identity?" "Yes, I'm a girl." Logan gave Eli a warm grin. "Did you always wear dark clothing, Eli?"

"Mm-nn." "What did you wear?" "Pinks and purples. Sometimes green or red with a little bit of light blue." The small talk had finally gotten the last of Eli's shaking to stop. Logan glanced at the clock. "Darn. The buses have left." "I-I can call my mom." Logan nodded his head and Eli took her phone out from her jacket. "...M-Mom? I-I'm okay. ...No, I'm still at school; I...I missed my bus. Um...I'm in Mr. Sanders classroom right now, did you want to talk to him? ...Okay, hang on a minute, mom." "What's your mother's name?" "Cindy."

Logan took the phone and placed it next to his ear. "Cindy? This is Mr. Sanders."  _"Oh, thank goodness. Is Eli okay?"_ "Yes, she's fine." Eli's mother paused at his words. "She...actually missed her bus because she had an anxiety attack right outside my classroom. I had her come and sit down, and help her through it."  _"Oh God. And you're sure it was an anxiety attack?"_ "Yes. I believe it was because she's being bullied at school." Cindy sighed on the other end; it seems that she too is aware of Eli's bullying and her child's reluctance to open up about it.  _"Alright. How much longer will you be at the school, Mr. Sanders?"_ "For as long as it takes for you to come pick her up. I tend to get here just as the janitor is finishing up so I have a key to the building." Logan wasn't surprised at the shock in Cindy's little chirp of wonder.  _"...Well, then I should be there to get her in a little over an hour; I work downtown and I still have another twenty minutes before my shift's over."_ "Alright. I'll make sure we're at the front entrance before you get here. Take care."

Logan handed the phone back to Eli, waiting for her to put in back in her pocket. "Why don't you get started on your homework, Eli? If you need help with any of it, feel free to ask me, alright?" "W-What about you?" Logan chuckled warmly. "I've got my own homework to finish up. Don't worry, I'll be here if you need me." Eli nodded, getting out of her seat to grab her bag from the spot Logan placed it next to the door. Eli actually surprised him by taking the seat directly across from his desk, settling into the chair after getting the opened bottle of water and the granola bar; it seems she might take a moment to actually eat the snack after all. Logan went back to his own chair, saving the printout and opening up the script Roman had sent him. The Prince was good at proofreading his own writings, but he did like to have a second set of eyes look it over to make sure everything was correct; Logan's set of eyes to be exact.

The duo sat and worked in silence, though Logan noticed that Eli was showing the same behavior Virgil did when he was getting through his own anxiety attack. "Eli," He started, getting the girl's attention, "if you'd like, you may work at my desk. I certainly have more than enough room to accommodate us both." "U-Uh...okay." She gathered her things and placed them onto his desk, taking a moment to drag the chair that was in one of the little corner desks over and sat down. "Ah, mathematics. You must be starting the basic algebra class with Mrs. Gat?" Eli hummed, flipping the textbook open to the correct page before taking her pencil and started to solve the problems assigned to the class.

Twenty minutes had passed at this point, Logan impressed by how quickly Eli was able to finish up most of her homework; she was bouncing between assignments whenever she got stuck on a problem with her math homework, taking that moment of frustration and turning it into productive energy. "Ugh." "What's wrong?" "It's this equation. I checked the back to make sure it was correct, but I have a different answer than what I'm suppose to get." "May I see?" Eli let out a breath of defeat, turning her notebook around so Logan could see what was keeping her stuck in place. "Ah. You know, I'm pretty sure many of your classmates are going to get stuck with this problem too, but I think I can help you out." "Really?" Logan gave his student a smile. "Yes. I believe that she's going to teach you about PEMDAS during your next class." Eli was understandably lost. "PEMDAS?" "It's an acronym for Parentheses, Exponents, Multiplication/Division, Addition/Subtraction. It's the order of operations for mathematics."

"Oh. So...I do the equation in the order of PEMDAS?" "Yes. There's a common mnemonic Mrs. Gat will most likely teach you with it." "What's that?" "Please Excuse My Dear Aunt Sally." Eli clearly understood the correlation between the acronym and the mnemonic. "Okay...so, first parentheses..." Eli muttered as she began the problem over from the top, Logan smiling to her from behind his thermos as he took a drink, going back to his own work. Just before an hour was up, Logan started to pack up, stilling when he saw that Eli was actively listening to him while she stroked the stuffed animal. "...Eli, may I ask you something?" "O-Oh, uh, yeah." "Did...Did you feel calmer while you listened to me work?" She nodded. "What sound did you find the most calming?" "The...The typing. I...also kinda liked your muttering too." "I mutter?" Logan asked, surprised; Eli giggled. "Yeah. It was usually just about small things, but I found it calming."

"Eli, do you have access to the internet at home?" She nodded her head, unsure of why he asked. "I have a special little assignment for you to do." "What is it?" "I want you to go to YouTube and look up ASMR videos." "ASMR?" "Autonomous sensory meridian response, or ASMR, is a type of audio-tactile response the human body can have upon hearing a certain sound known as a trigger. When you hear your trigger, you'll tend to feel a tingling sensation starting at your scalp and move down your spine; ASMR can be a useful tool for those who have high stress or anxiety. I have a good friend who has heightened anxiety and we've found that him listening to ASMR videos does help lower his anxiety; I want you to explore through the videos you find and see what you respond to." Eli, after a moment, nodded her head. "Do you want me to give you a report of what I respond to?" Logan nodded.

"I've postponed them because last week was midterms, but I hold a study hall in my classroom after school is out for students who need help with their homework to come. I tend to play soft music to help them focus, but for a few of my students, I let them use the computers so they can listen to sounds or certain audio that helps keeps them calm or lets them focus better. If you'd like to come to one of the study halls, I'd be more than happy to let you use one of the computers if you start to feel overwhelmed." Eli's cheeks flushed and her eyes darted away. "I...I'll think about it." "Are...you okay?" Eli coiled upright in her chair, cheeks still flushed. "Y-Yes! Yes, I'm fine, Mr. Sanders." However, Logan smirked. "You know, it still amazes me that my students have a crush on me. It's flattering, but I'm afraid my friendship is all I can offer." Eli's cheeks went darker, but she seemed to relax at his words; there was clearly a bad history for her of older men trying to come onto her.

He may have to talk to her mother about that another time.

"Come. Your mother should be here in a few minutes." Eli gave him a weak smile, gathering her belongings and putting them back in her bag, placing Rose onto his desk. "You don't want to hold onto her overnight?" Logan asked, getting Eli to still. "Are...you sure?" "I'm sure. As long as you bring her back with you to class tomorrow, I don't mind if you take care of her overnight." There was that honest smile Logan was hoping for. Eli almost squealed as she took Rose back into her arms, holding her securely in her arms as Eli followed Logan out of his classroom and down to the main floor. A car drove up only three minutes later. "Thank you again, Mr. Sander, for staying with my daughter." "It's no trouble at all, Cindy." "Still...I'm honestly surprised when you called Eli 'she'; many of her teachers always mistake her as a boy." "I'll make sure to talk to them so they can correct the pronouns they're using when addressing Eli; I imagine that move to this area was hard enough, let alone transferring into a new school in a place you don't know."

Cindy gave Logan a bright grin. "...I think you'll become Eli's favorite teacher pretty quick." Logan chuckled. "Somehow, I don't doubt that. Have a good night, you two." Logan waved them off, waiting until they were off school grounds before he pulled out his phone, dialing up one of the numbers. "...Patton? Hey, listen, I just wanted to say...thank you. ...For making Rose; yes, the bunny. No, no. She's in good hands tonight. ...Is that for dinner? That does sound good; maybe add a little garlic to Virgil's plate? ...Yes, that would be lovely. Alright. I'll be home in about twenty minutes. See you then."


End file.
